I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Randomize
