Plan B is the new Plan A
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize