i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Every concussion has its silver lining
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize