My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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