i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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