You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
