just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
