i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
