You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
