She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize