I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
