If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
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