More tranny stories later!
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
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