I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Randomize
