i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
did you just send me my own nude
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
