Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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