puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
