This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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