nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
