Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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