She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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