you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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