I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I think my moral compass just broke
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
