NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
