Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
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