it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Randomize
