At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
