At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Randomize
