Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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