My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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