SEEEEXXX PLEASE
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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