Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
porn star boner night. come get it.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
do nipples grow back?
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize