you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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