Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Drake has all the answers
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
