Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
