we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
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