Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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