She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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