One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
she looked like the before picture.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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