i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I need water and some morals
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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