You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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