so let's talk penis.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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