come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
they're like a gay fantastic four
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Randomize
