Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
