I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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