i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
