Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
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