is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
