hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
