I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
